“I guess you’re just one of the unlucky ones”

Cramping, slowly working it’s way from my lower abdomen to my back.

Get the heating pads.

Then down my legs.

“Dammit. It’s okay. You’ve got this, deep breaths Taylore. You can do it” I say to myself.

Instantly sweating- the cramping intensifies.

Time to take an opioid.

The nausea sets in.

“F****ck. No, It’s okay. You can do it, the pain killer will set in soon. Focus on your breath”

Cramping intensifies. Beads of sweat roll down my face.

Text Garret to let him know shits about to go down and that I might need him or need him to send someone.

Run to the bathroom.

“Time to buckle down. You can do it”

Vomiting… excessive, forceful vomiting.

My body starts to shake.

Take another opioid.

Cramping intensifies.

More heat on my abdomen, back and legs. And yet still so much sweat all over the rest of my body.

I start to loose my vision and the rest of my body starts to contract.

“Focus on your breath Taylore. You can do it. It won’t last forever. You can do it.”

More vomiting…. more cramping…

Finally it starts to subside. I can make it to the floor in the living room and set up camp for the rest of the day. Anytime I try to stand- I almost pass out. It’s hard for me to keep my eyes open.

The pain comes and goes. Luckily the vomiting is no more.

This happens every month. Every cycle. Since I first started menstruating.

I’ve heard:

“I guess you’re just one of the unlucky ones”

“It might get better when you have a kid. If it doesn’t then we can do something”

“You should get pregnant, that would fix it”- yes… and actual MD told me that when I was in emergency one cycle.

The western medical system has failed me greatly on this one. All I get are opioids and suggestions that I should get pregnant. Hormone therapy doesn’t work. Opioids barely help. And no exams or blood work show anything.

Subconscious imprinting did help though. No, this issue is obviously not totally resolved yet. AND it’s coming along.

It’s less time now and that in itself is amazing.

I have done some very intense healing through subconscious imprinting with my uterus and these insane cycles.

When nothing else worked- hormone therapy, opioids, herbs, acupuncture, chiro, reiki, massage, naturopath, exercise, diet therapy, Cannibis, etc…

Subconscious Imprinting helped.

Why? Because this is all emotional and generational trauma I am holding in my uterus.

I refuse to accept that I am “just one of the unlucky ones”

I am lucky because I have a therapy like Subconscious Imprinting. I am lucky because I am healing generational traumas that won’t continue on. I am lucky because I have learnt to love how powerful my body really is. And I am lucky because I have hope that I wont live like this forever.

My body takes me down, expectedly yet unexpectedly every single month. I have to cancel patients, miss classes or events.

And yet I am GRATEFUL ,

I am grateful my body is telling me in such a powerful way that I still have more to work on.

I am grateful that I can see the beauty in the situation,

and I am grateful that I have learnt to not “power through” and really spend time digging up that old deep generational trauma that no one has dealt with.

What is your body telling you?

And are you willing to be vulnerable enough to listen to it?